For those who listen to Find Your Birth Joy on Audible.com, it is sometimes useful to see the Exercises and Resources written out. All Exercises and Resources discussed in the audiobook are included below for your ease of reference. Enjoy!

Exercise 1: Write out your answers the following questions. (Ch. 1)

  • Why are you choosing natural childbirth? Once you've come up with your first answer, ask yourself Why is [insert your answer] important to me? 
  • Repeat this second Why question at least five or six times to really get the bottom of why this is important to you. *[See example below.]
  • Where do you visualize the birth happening? In other words, where will you feel most comfortable and supported while birthing? You, not anyone else. It's your birth experience. You need to be the one who is comfortable. Hospitals, birthing centers, and birthing at home are all options. You can have a natural birth at any location! Where will you feel most secure and be most able to focus?
  • What excites you about a natural childbirth? (You can repeat the re-asking aspect of Question 1 and Question 3 here as well.)
  • What scares you about birthing naturally? Small or large, list your fears now; write them down and discuss them with your birthing team so you can move on! (More on assembling your team in Tip #6, and on releasing your fears in Tip #7.)
  • Who do you want to have with you at your baby's birth? Please note that the question is not, "Who wants to be there,” but whose presence do you feel will bring support as you bring your child into the world? If there is someone who wants to be with you whom you feel might compromise your ability to focus on the natural birthing experience, you'll need to have a tough conversation with that person. Consider only having people present who feel essential.

* Example answers to Question 1:

  • ​Why am I choosing a natural childbirth? 
  • I don't want medical interventions in my birth if they aren't absolutely necessary.
  • Why is avoiding medical interventions important to me? 
  • I believe unnecessary medical interventions disrupt the birth process.
  • Why is not disrupting the birth process important to me? 
  • I want to make sure I create a deep bond with my new baby right away.
  • Why is it important to me to deeply bond with my baby right away?
  • I want to set us both up for successful breastfeeding, and have read that limiting medical interventions is the best way to do that.
  • Why is it important to me to breastfeed "successfully"? 
  • To provide healthy nourishment and bonding with my new baby.
  • Why is providing healthy nourishment and bonding important to me? 
  • These are very important values in my life; healthy nourishment and deep, authentic bonds with other people.
  • Why are nourishment and bonds with others important to me? 
  • Because life is more fulfilling when I'm connected to those around me and feeling healthy.
  • Why is life more fulfilling when I'm deeply connected and feeling healthy?
  • Because I can take whatever life throws at me when I'm feeling healthy, and I enjoy experiencing life to the fullest, the good and the bad, the highs and lows, by letting myself feel deeply connected.

As you can see, by asking "Why" over and over, we've found the deep-seated, intrinsic motivations for having a natural childbirth. The answer to the first "Why" was a good one, "I don't want medical interventions in my birth that aren't absolutely necessary." But an answer like, "I enjoy experiencing life to the fullest, the good and the bad, the highs and lows, by letting myself feel deeply connected" is much more beautiful, heartfelt, and personally motivating. Additionally, there are many ways to honor a core need like the example one above. A deeper sentiment is usually more applicable to any changing course your birth might take, helping you to stay flexible in the process. I encourage you to get down to the core of your natural child birthing desires.

Ch 2. Resources

​Books:
  • Anything you can get your hands on by Michel Odent. Though, to be fair, he states the following: “My books are not for pregnant women to read,” says Odent. “Their time is too precious; they should be looking at the moon, singing to their unborn baby and contemplating.”
  • Birthing from Within by Pam England and Rob Horowitz
  • Childbirth Without Fear: The Principles and Practice of Natural Childbirth by Grantly Dick-Read
  • Expecting Better by Emily Oster
  • Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering: A Doctor's Guide to Natural Childbirth and Gentle Early Parenting Choices by Sarah Buckley
  • Husband-Coached Childbirth: The Bradley Method of Natural Childbirth by Dr. Robert A. Bradley
  • HypnoBirthing, The Mongan Method by Marie Mongan 
  • Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, Birth Matters, and/or Spiritual Midwifery, all by Ina May Gaskin
  • Medical Beginnings, Enchanted Lives by Deepak Chopra, MD
  • Mindful Birthing: Training the Mind, Body, and Heart for Childbirth and Beyond by Nancy Bardacke, CNM
  • Natural Hospital Birth: The Best of Both Worlds by Cynthia Gabriel 
  • Return to the Great Mother by Dr. Isa Gucciardi
  • The Birth Partner: A Complete Guide to Childbirth for Dads, Doulas, and All Other Labor Companions by Penny Simkin
  • Transformation Through Birth: A Woman's Guide by Claudia Panuthos
  • When Survivors Give Birth: Understanding and Healing the Effects of Early Sexual Abuse on Childbearing Women by Penny Simkin
  • Women's Bodies Women's Wisdom by Dr. Christiane Northrup
Articles:
​Birth Stories, Birth Blogs, Birth Podcasts: 
​​Organizations/Websites:

Ch 3. Resources

Guided Visualization, Meditation, and Depth-Hypnosis Resources:

Exercise 2: Create Your Personal Affirmations (Ch. 5) 

​Now that you're convinced of the importance of positivity, let's reframe some of the emotions you expressed in your answers to the Questions from Tip #1. You'll simply take each emotion or belief mentioned in your answers and put them into personally motivating statements.

For example, Question 1 was, "Why am I choosing a natural childbirth?" After asking myself that question eight times, I ended with this thought:
  • Because I can take whatever life throws at me when I'm feeling healthy, and I enjoy experiencing life to the fullest, the good and the bad, the highs and lows, by letting myself feel deeply connected.

Now, I have converted each of the four basic thoughts expressed in that answer into personal, motivating affirmations to use throughout pregnancy and during birth. 
  • I can take whatever life throws at me. 
  • I can take whatever this birth throws at me.
​
  • I am feeling healthy. 
  • I am feeling healthy during this birth.
​
  • I enjoy experiencing life to the fullest, the good and the bad. 
  • I enjoy experiencing birth to the fullest, the good and the challenging.
​
  • I let myself feel deeply connected. 
  • I feel deeply connected during this birth.
​
Repeat this exercise for your answers to Questions 2, 3, and 5 from Tip #1.

For your answers to Question 4, consider noting your fears by starting the affirmation with "I release/acknowledge/let-go of [insert your fear(s) here]" and follow it up with a positive statement that turns your fear around.
Example:
  • I release my fear of not-being-in-control. 
  • I stay fluid and will control what I can.

Ch 5. Resources

Documentaries/Videos to Watch: ​* As of July, 2016, these documentaries were available for free on Netflix.​

Birth Stories to Read:Podcasts:​Study:

Ch. 6 Resources

Ch. 8 Questions

  • How do I feel? Really. Tune in. How do you really feel right now?
  • What is it I need today? Can I state this need aloud?
  • What would help me feel my best right now, in this moment?
  • Could I be more comfortable? (Consider what you're wearing, how you're sitting or moving, how much you've slept, with whom you've interacted today, and whether or not you're holding tension anywhere in your body.) How can I feel more comfortable in this moment?
  • Do I need help in some small or large way today? Whom could I ask for help?
  • Can I say "no" to something to help my day or week run more smoothly?
  • What can I do to indulge in my intuition about what my body needs?
  • What can I move off of my "To-Do" list onto a "Not-Going-To-Bother-With-It" list? (Side note: these lists are super fun to make.) #screwthelistsaltogether #destressforthewin #winnersrelax
  • How can I feel more "feminine," "motherly," or "woman-of-the-earth-y" for just a moment today? (This is helpful the closer you come to the birth. Babies seem to get the message: they move into the head-down position and begin labor when mom trusts and feels more in-her-body than head-and-thought-centered. Birth is a bodily-driven process, after all, not a thought-driven one. I recommend getting into nature: walk barefoot in the grass, wear flowing clothing or flowers in your hair, dance, stop reading super-intellectual books for a minute, and hold some babies, for example. OK, you get the idea. I'll stop with the flower-child talk.)

Ch 11. Resources & Definitions

  • Birth affirmations: In addition to those you wrote for yourself in Tip #5, I urge you to continue adding to that list of positive affirmations that you can read or someone can read to you during birth. Only use affirmations that resonate and feel good to you. *Example Birth Affirmations Below     
  • Birth classes: Consider taking birth preparation classes offered at a hospital or elsewhere. You can find many classes that address a variety of topics: birth logistics, pain coping techniques (like HypnoBirthing© and labor massage) breastfeeding, infant care, infant CPR, maintaining couple connection, budgeting for a baby and much more. If you can, try to take a birth preparation class that is oriented toward natural birthing. Your doula or midwife will be a wonderful source of information for classes available in your area. 
  • Declining unnecessary vaginal exams: If you're birthing in a hospital setting, especially a teaching hospital, then you might find yourself having repeated vaginal exams when new doctors, nurses, or students come on shift during your labor. Vaginal exams give doctors and midwives a lot of important information. Since you trust your team, you probably want to let them gather all the important information they need to give you the best care. But since cervical checks are only one marker of labor progression, and having repeated checks can interrupt your labor flow, consider asking "Why?" when you're told you need yet another vaginal check. This is a moment where you can choose how a provider interacts with your body. You might feel thrilled that they will check you and give you some indication of "progression." But you might, respectfully, say you don't want to interrupt your labor with yet another vaginal exam at this time, especially if you recently had one and there doesn't seem to be a concrete reason to have another. Stay open to the moment, but remember that ultimately you can choose when someone interacts with your body in this intimate way. (More on this in Knowing your dilation below.)
  • Early labor practice: During early labor, most women have longer breaks between contractions. Some people are encouraged to distract themselves during this time. But it's also a good idea to practice your releasing, non-clenching, and birth breathing tactics while the sensations are more manageable. I did a combination of both—practicing my birth breathing, positions, releasing, etc., and also some distracting (like reading) between contractions, which came every 15 minutes or so for the first day.
  • Eating and drinking: If you're hungry, your midwife or doula might suggest you eat a little something to keep your energy up. Even a spoonful of honey can give you a quick boost if you aren't craving food. Drinking water and/or electrolyte drinks (like coconut water) is often helpful. Be sure to discuss with caregivers before eating or drinking. 
  • Knowing your dilation: This one is tricky. As stated above in “Declining unnecessary vaginal exams”, vaginal exams give doctors and midwives a lot of important information. Since you trust your team, you probably want to let them gather all the important information they need to give you the best care. In some situations, however, you can request not to have repeated vaginal exams, or maybe simply ask that you not be told a number to denote your dilation. For some people, hearing a number instantly makes them calculate how long it has been to get this far versus how long they think they still have to labor. But dilation in centimeters is often not a linear marker of your progress or of a timeline. (For example, some women hover around 2 or 3 cm dilated for many hours, only to fly through to 10 cm and begin pushing 30-60 minutes later. Others can start labor and move quickly, finding themselves at 7 or 8cm the first time they're checked, only to stay there for a long while.) For me, I didn't really mind knowing the number, but that's because I was prepared for the fact that it wouldn't really tell me how much longer labor would continue. Some caregivers will feel uncomfortable gathering information, like your dilation, and then withholding that information from you. So discuss this ahead of time if you feel not knowing a number might be important for you. Consider asking the midwife or doctor to ask you after an exam, "Do you want to know your dilation?" And, as I've stated before, stay flexible. What you want before labor has the potential to change during labor.
  • Pelvic Floor Exercise: Kegel exercises and yoga for your pelvic floor are some examples of exercises that can strengthen and generally bring awareness to these seldom-contemplated muscles. I was encouraged to practice releasing, instead of clenching, and breathing deeply while having my daily bowel movements; this is the only sensation that even comes close to the sensation of birthing your baby. Practice relaxing into moving your bowels, instead of clenching to hasten the process.
  • Psychotherapy: The more self-assured you feel in general, (and perhaps also in your primary relationship) the better prepared you'll feel for your labor and birth. If you feel you have any unresolved issues that could come up during your labor (especially related to past sexual or birth trauma) consider finding a qualified professional to help work through these issues. Couples therapy can also help you prepare and/or repair before the birth of your child. 

Ch. 12 Resources

Exercise 3: Trust your Feelings and Instincts (Ch. 13)


Especially if you tend to identify yourself as being more "rational" than “intuitive” (right brain versus left brain), work through the following points to help you get in better touch with your instincts.
Do you have a feeling about when your child will be born? Do you feel s/he will arrive before, after, or near your "due date"? These questions help get you to touch into your intuition. I, for example, had a sense that my daughter would be born in February, even though her "due date" was March 5. Sure enough, she was born on February 21. There wasn't any logical reason for me to think she would arrive early; it was completely a gut feeling. But stay flexible and try not to get discouraged or discount your intuition if you think your baby is coming early and then you're still pregnant at 40 or 41 weeks.
Do you have a sixth sense about your child's gender if you do not already know it? 
Can you imagine how your baby is currently positioned in your belly? Lie down for a few minutes and ponder whether you think the baby's head is up or down, right or left, feet crossed or apart, hands in front of face or at the side, etc.
Talk to your baby as thought s/he is already here. Point out interesting things that are happening to you both throughout the day. Also, discuss the upcoming birth with your baby. Like you, your baby will go through a momentous challenge and journey on the day of his/her birth. You can already help him/her feel confident and excited by discussing the birth you have planned. Reiterate that you'll be working together to bring new life into the world.